30 divorced and confused about life?

Hi, I am 30 and had a very bad experience in the past where it was arranged marriage and it was a disaster. I have ever since been worried about my future ,I have nightmares that I might die alone. I am an introvert, so i have problems forming networks. I hoped for a typical married life and a loving family with kids, but this incident has uprooted me, I am not able to concentrate on my career and have been in a confused state of mind. I do have male friends that are good , but have not been able to find the one, my soulmate.Also, my astro chart indicates a late marriage but not a very content married life , arguments with spouse etc... I am not superstitious, I thougt astrology would give me some answers as I was very confused, so approached it ...plz help